Resolutions:

1. Get an early jump on resolutions for 2015. I can do this.

2. Listen to Mudhoney. Yes, their records and live performances, but here I mean to include their suggestions, opinions and endorsements as well. The performance of the reunited Flesh Eaters which Mudhoney opened on Tuesday, January 13th was just phenomenally good, even for a somewhat casual fan. Other examples include: the 2004 MC5/DKT tour (Mark sang), feedtime’s Seattle performance in 2012 (also a Mudhoney bill), the 2014 Sub Pop South America tour with Obits and METZ they helped to make happen, and… Though I could go on (ask anyone who suffers through working here with me) no doubt you get the picture. Even though I don’t think they had anything to do with the just-fucking-incredibly-good Scratch Acid reunion show at the Showbox a few years back, their track record is so good that I’m going to go ahead and make the association in my own memory. And, I am already looking forward to the shows they will play with Strange Wilds in the future that I am willing into existence (note to Mudhonies: please play some shows with Strange Wilds).

3. Make less of a big deal out of things like the bumper sticker, one of maybe 15, on the back of the red Chevy Genero-Sedan, which cut me off on this morning’snear- interminable crawl up the viaduct which read: “My other ride is YOUR MOM.” Maybe this person’s own mom was unavailable for riding? Perhaps this is, after all, okay with MY MOM? Accept what you can’t change, etc…

4. With the recent transition of the talented Mr. Frere-Jones from the New Yorker to Rap Genius or now Genius Just (RIP M. Hedberg) pin hopes for NY’er coverage of the brilliant new METZ album (details still TBA) elsewhere. That or shoot for annotation of same. Also: figure out what “annotation” means in this context.

5. W/R/T Sleater-Kinney, their new album No Cities to Love, and the towering, enduring talent it flaunts, admit and embrace that “surface envy” is an understatement. This is deep, abiding and well-earned envy. (And, while we’re on the subject of getting comfy with radioactive levels of well-justified envy, look at the big brain on this guy, mere weeks after his band’s debut album was certified gold.)

6. Investigate synonyms for “share.” This or give up reading music press releases, music-related news items, and the like. Alternate solution: substitute “crap out” for “share” every time it’s encountered in these materials. Laugh derisively to self, without the jovial camaraderie of friends and co-workers, maybe, for a moment, feel superior-ish. Repeat as necessary, with diminishing returns, die friendless and afraid. Wait, DON’T do this!

7. Sign up for innovative and largely fictional new streaming service SAP! Pitch to relevant parties new SAP/ASAP ad campaign and imagine, in embarrassing, florid detail, resulting wealth, how it will be spent, used to destroy entirety of enemies list, etc.

8. Re-watch Chad VanGaalen’s wild, stupefying new video for Shabazz Palaces’ “Forerunner Foray.” Make contact, conceptually, with Magic Johnson flying on a piece of pizza.

9. Recognize that most of what people are listening to through streaming services comes through playlists. And the most popular of these playlists, the ones that are really, I am led to believe, WORKING, are those with names like “Coffee Shop Indie Workout Mix,” “Sunday Morning Sex Jams,” or “It’s Friday Night and I Like Alternative Music.” And then, surrender to the idea of lowest common denominator playlist titling as PROMOTIONAL BEST PRACTICE with Sub Pop playlists bearing names like “Happy Top Songs Best,” “100 Great Music Things,” “Today’s Massive Hit Time,” etc. (consider repurposing spam subject lines for this use?). Nobody’s interest is going to be piqued by “Flatulent Mid-Morning,” so just knock that shit off.

10. Make it all the way to 10 this year.

Now there’s a horse without a rider…

Chris

Playlist also available for your listening pleasures on Rdio